Yes Wedding Tinkles not Bells, the tinkles are for my brother, he got married yesterday, I think? Does that surprise you that I don't know, well it does me. It all started a few months ago when my mum told me that my brother and his girlfriend are planning to marry in the Autumn. Now she is from another European country, so the plan was for them to marry there. A few weeks later I was told that they may just head off to a registry office and get married here, without any fuss. Ok by me, we do after all live in a free country and everyone has the right to do as they please, does that sound bad, it's not meant to, I am a great believer in everyone being equal regardless of colour, creed or anything else, so if that is what they want then that's fine. I jokingly said we could gatecrash, I wouldn't have, its not my style. Jump forward to Friday and my mum tells me they are getting married tomorrow with 2 witnesses, no family. I feel fine with that, a little sorry for my mum as she is heading off for a planned visit next week, so they could have waited or timed it better, but hey its their life.
You see I am writing this with tears in my eyes, why? because he has not told me himself nor has he contacted me to let me know that he is now married, I feel slightly hurt by this. He once along time ago told my mum that we were not close and believe me this was news to me, we don't live near each other but I have always felt that come whatever I would always be there for him if he needed me. A few years after that he told me he would never come back home to live as the area he was bought up in was full of louts who drank all the time and good for nothings, I did point out that we were not all like that and his reply was to tell me how un-cultured and un-educated we were.........................................say no more. This issue has a double edged sword for me as I sit here feeling very sad, you see a "colleague" a few months ago, during a heated exchange said that the trouble with me is that I always think everything is about ME, so you see I can't even feel sorry for myself anymore as I know the whole world is not about me, I never thought it was, now everytime I feel hurt, anger or sadness by what someone has said her words echo in my head..................see she was right. I just need a hug sometimes, like everyone else.
Huggies to everyone and I will post piccies of Herbie tomorrow, if you all don't mind, I haven't the heart to take his picture at the mo and I don't think I could see through the tears either.